shift in corporate structure

seems that statement has been the crux of my entire career at one point or another...many points actually.
after 20 years in the music business, numerous bankruptcies, acquisitions, buyouts, downsizes and restructures ,i found myself without a job and with very few options music-related to find work. through a good friend, i got a referral for a job and quickly found myself in the magazine publication/distribution business. somewhat slightly music related, in that i assist in the creation of a weekly sales flyer (that people around here seem to thing is Rolling Stone - which is quite funny to me...it's a SALES FLYER on glossy, overpriced color paper, but whatever, everyone has their own levels of self importance) i've gone from a nationally recognized product specialist, managing inventory across the country, multimillion dollar budgets, creative campaign design and execution, store planning and layout to a coordinator.
it was announced today that a portion of the company that i work for has been sold off. (a portion that i actually started my illustrious music career with, oddly enough) and it's fine, that's not the bother - i know the music business is a dying industry, sales and distribution are collapsing as every moment ticks by. i understand that. i am glad i am no longer a part of that. i guess what i find upsetting or distressing is that i had hope that there would still be room for me - somewhere. that i would be able to keep music around me and that i would be able to make a living off my knowledge and expertise. i guess the realization and acceptance is as slow and painful for me as the collapse of the industry itself. i'm sad today over what i was and apparently won't ever be again. getting over it in stages, i suppose. i'm just a coordinator now and no one knows or cares what experience i may have to offer. i find myself in a job and an industry that i have no particular interest in, and with creative types that are passionate about what they do, but i do not share in their passion. i desperately want to be closer to music again. i'm not sure how or where.

Hallowe'en on the brain(s)

funny thing dude said yesterday that he was in a Hallowe'en mood....feeling Hallowe'enie. noot sure if it was the slightly cooler weather over the past few days (from the previous week of upper 90s) or what - but he was having Hallowe'en thoughts. it's not like we haven't been talking about our costumes for the past 3 or 4 months or anything...sheesh.
then i log in to the face place and one of the things i am a fan of, er "like" we whatever you call it has something to do with spooky stuff in LA. i can across a new blog...The Spooky Vegan - and i decided to follow her! (hi Spooky Vegan) while not 100% vegan (don't have the time, patience or funding) i certainly eat mostly vegan. no meat, no cheese (reluctantly) no dairy, some eggs, sometimes tuna, rarely ever shrimp....but for the most part i live a pretty cruelty free life.
and Hallowe'en? well...i've won 3 costume contests....judged by the elite of the costume world - creature fx nerds - not to brag - but hallowe'en is a pretty BFD in my world. like i said, been talking about this years' costumes for about 4 months now. WAS gonna to that ^ but don't have the cash. so now we're trying to think of something else. i have no idea. i might have dude do me up all gross and dead-like. we'll see.
now i'm all Hallowe'enie, too!! i can't believe it's barely 2 months away!!
but i have a headache....
L8

30 things i like about myself

so i hear/read it's "like yourself week" and i also hear/read that one should blog about things that are difficult or hard to write about...so here we go:
what i like about myself
1. my big boobs, which for the most part, are remarkably firm for their size!
2. i'm not ashamed of sex (which you will read more about as we go on with this list) i like to experiment.
3. i give good, no GREAT blowjobs
4. i like that i can do almost whatever i want with my hair: straight, curly, up, down, knots. etc.
5. my passion and knowledge of music
6. my irrational, emotional response to animals...i LOVE that about myself
7. that i can live without eating meat
8.i am a great cook
9.my big brown eyes
10. my cuban background
(uh-oh, now it's getting difficult)
11. my strong work ethic
12.i have perfect feet (toes are in perfect order, not weird or crooked)
13. i like my smile
14. i like (almost) all my choices of tattoos
15.i have finally found a way to spin a positive response
16. but i also like my cynisism
17. i like my sarcastic sense of humor
18.i like that i can be a girlie girl at the same time as being one of the guys
19. i am not easily offended
(getting stuck again)
20.i am a great friend
21.my affinity for all things sparkly
(gah! 30? really?)
22. i am a very good judge of character
23.i am a good mother to my cats
24.i survived parochial school
25.i have experienced drugs and appreciate the experience(s)
26.i like that i was strong enough to move away from my hometown to a place where i hardly knew anyone
27.i was strong enough to get out of a bad relationship, even if it took 10 years
(almost there!)
28.i am a completely 100% devoted lover
29.i support the rights of GBLT's
and i wonder what more there might be....
30.i can admit when i am wrong

ok, so i guess that wasn't so bad. maybe since i'm doing this from work, i'm not putting TOO much into every word. an interesting exercise though. what 30 things do you like about YOU?

oops

so i was just reading on a popular blog, that one should not write about work...or lunch. i guess i have done "work" a few too many times, so i'll do my best to curb that. however, i just must share this one little tidbit about the toad that sits less than 3 feet from my face. along with gasping for breath after ever sip of beverage - she also burps or hiccups throughout the day - without even a quiet pardon or excuse of herself.
kinda rude, no?

different levels of BS

so at the new job, there's this privileged little persian prince. an arrogant bastard, misogynistic, filled with hubris and self deserving righteousness. i can't stand the little fucker. he gets away with whatever he can "it's not my fault" is a common phrase that comes out of his mouth. he is never disciplined or help accountable and it's completely frustrating. he chews with his mouth open, talks with his mouth full of food and has no respect for women at all. he's lazy. "i couldn't figure it out, so i gave up" was one of the most amazing things i have ever heard anyone say in the workplace.
he goes out drinking regularly with the department and everyone thinks it's really funny when he's hungover or makes a fool of himself in the process.
obviously sending the wrong message to the boy by giving him nothing but positive reinforcement for his behavior which is disrespectful and for the most part unacceptable.
and he gets away with it. it's unbelievable.

As your tourguide along your trip through the obvious....

....it's offensive, immature, low class, a sign of insecurity and down-right rude to constantly refer to how much money you and/or your family has.

Is it Me?

i ask this question a lot, i guess. so we know i have a new job - that i like. i LOVED it when i 1st started, now i just like it. it's fine. it's easy. i've done this before, and it's pretty far from where my career has gone. it's different from having fiscal responsibilities on a national level. i come in, i do my job, i go home. there's really very little pressure at all.(but that's an entirely different post) i have the pressure of timing, things have to be done by a certain time each week and here's where i wonder if it's me:
since people wait on me to collect the information they need to do their jobs - i get it done as quickly as possible. and when i'm done, i'm done. i've got nothing to do and i find myself bored (again) surfing the net or whatever. now, as the summer drags on and we get closer to the 4th quarter, this will change, i'm sure - and i'll have so much work that i'll be stressed out and crying by the end of the week!
see, i don't like to hang on to work. i do't like to dilly dally just so i can seem to have work to do. i want it done and off my desk! it's like i have poor time management, going the opposite direction!
i'm trying to psyche myself out of it though - and not have it be a negative. it's great that i'm so good at my job that i can spend time doing other things. i get my job done quickly and accurately. (for the most part) like a machine, or so i've been told.